I don’t want pity or empathy, this is just a story… Words I’ve always hated coz I could never experience them are bliss and passion. I fucking hate those words. I’ve come to understand that I’m differently wired, there’s a huge gap in my psyche. After 8 years of studies, after buying a superbike, motocross, music, xbox, fuck anything else I’ve not had any formation of passion, no drive no lust. Imagine going sky diving and not feeling excited afterwards, I mean what do I have to do to feel.
So this is where I’m at, no matter what I do my brain can’t create enough chemicals to allow me to feel, only this constant nothingness. I’m done with this I can’t be like this, what’s the point when you can’t feel anything that you’re doing, is that not the whole point of life to experience these emotions and following what your heart desires, or working hard to fulfill those dreams.
I don’t have dreams neither goals coz as I meet them it’s still nothing. Oh well dunno what else to do, just don’t want to be like this.